|Never run away. Never.|
In fact, I'm a huge fan of the portion of the career that would probably keep them out of the Rock Hall than get them in: The Cornball Hard Rock/ Cheese Pop '80s Heart. Ann and Nancy Wilson and their cast of goons have been trotting live performances of the alleged classic "Dreamboat Annie" around the country when they should have been scorching the earth with their self-titled 1985 nuclear bomb.
"Alone." "Never." "What About Love?" "Nothin' At All." Even freaking "These Dreams" - complete with a video where Nancy rocks out on guitar even though there are zero guitars in the soft-as-a-marshmallow hit.
I realize Hall voters will want to acknowledge their spot as early women in hard rock, and if they get in before or with Joan Jett, I won't light my head on fire like I might if, say, the Beastie Boys get in.
Still, I think voters and the world should take into evidence the fact that Heart has some of the all-time worst album covers, the kind that could place amongst the worst with this and this and this.
Here are six of Heart's stinkbomb covers:
Harry Mayes from 97.5 The Fan: "What is goin' on back there?"
1. "Private Audition," 1982. The album title alone could keep Heart out of the Rock Hall; it sounds like some kind of movie you tried to watch through squiggly lines on Skinemax when you were 13 (and by "you" I mean "me"). But what about the photos? What about the dude peering through the blinds? What about the lit cigar that threatens to burn the whole place down? What about the fact that the tracklist includes titles like "City's Burnin'," "Hey Darlin' Darlin'" and "Fast Times"? Without hearing a note I know I would have to be paid a lot of money to sit through this record. In fact, I'm getting sick just looking at it.