Steve Perry: Rock Hall can go eff itself

 All it took to pull us out of hiatus was an out-of-nowhere shot at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame by one of rock's greatest and most unheralded vocalists.

Ex-Journey lead singer Steve Perry recently told Billboard Magazine that Journey doesn't need to be in the Hall in order to solidify its place in the lore of rock history.

"I'm not a big fan of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. It's just a personal thing, not an ego thing. I think that, honestly, Journey doesn't need to be in the Hall of Fame. With everything we accomplished ... we've had our Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, you know? It's in the hearts of the people out there and their experiences and their memories of what we did together."

Maybe Perry, aka The Voice, was sidestepping the actual question from Gary Graff - which was would Journey do a one-off reunion if they got in the Rock Hall one day - because Perry has an actual working brain, and he knows Neal Schon and the other remaining king-sized douchebags in the sham-of-a-band would never swallow their pride and reform the band under any circumstances. Come on, dudes, you know you're a better band with Steve as the singer.

Only with the classic lineup do you get Air Everything.

Why? Why is the "classic" lineup of Journey not on tour right now? Why is this guy the lead singer, and why won't anyone acknowledge the total bullshit that's going on here. Even VH1 Classic looks the other way in a promo for one of their classic concert nights - for .1 seconds they use a clip of the current lead singer, what's-his-name, singing "Anyway You Want It" and then the second it goes to another shot, Perry's vocal seems to seep in. Journey continues to f*ck its own legacy, as evidenced by how they allowed David Chase to play their signature tune over the worst closing scene to a series in television history.

They can make it all right by reuniting with Perry. Why can't this happen? Look at Van Freaking Halen. Sure, Eddie is screwing up that victory lap by not reaching out and getting original bassist Michael Anthony in the mix, but he made up with Dave to give the fans what they want (DLR-era VH) and give their pockets what they want (straight-up hardcore cash money).

Money is the root of all evil, but it can also heal all wounds.

Look at The Police, Garbage, Afghan Whigs, The Pixies, Dinosaur Jr., Stone Temple Pilots, Superdrag, the "classic" lineup of Guided By Voices, Pavement, Soundgarden, Archers of Loaf and every other band that realized there was more money to be made if the egos were set aside in the name of doing what was right and, frankly, making sense.

Perry is actually correct. Journey doesn't need to be in the Rock Hall. But they should be.

But the situation there does bring up a good point and the possibility of actually improving the wretched Hall. If you get in, you should reunite. Better yet, if you get in, you HAVE to reunite. This would prevent numbnuts like Axl, Slash and Guns 'N' Roses from pussing out and refusing to get back together, and stop jerks like John Fogerty from accepting the trophy with Stu Cook and Doug Clifford and then not playing tunes with them at the induction ceremony.

(Should be noted here that Cook and Clifford are jackwads in their own right, for the mere existence of Creedence Clearwater Revisited which, by the way, will be at Dover Downs on April 13. Get your tickets now!!)

(Should also be noted here that R.E.M., which ceased being cool and relevant the second Bill Berry got up from the drum kit in 1997, realized this and reunited with Berry for an amazing set that only lost points for the kind of moberry duet with Ed Vedder on "Man on the Moon.")

Journey probably won't ever get in the Hall, Steve. But like you said, you can't stop believin'.

Rock Hall game: Better than coal?

Who got inducted when and how many hits did this band have and who performed to honor that lady are likely among the more than 1,700 questions and 87 cards players will see in the The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Trivia Board Game, one of many frivolous items currently being peddled at the Hall's website.

Questions most likely not asked in this product nudged somewhere between socks and Arby's gift cards on most people's Christmas list:

- Who is the biggest douche ever to be inducted? (Answer: Jackson Browne, 2004)

- How the hell are two of the biggest and best rock and roll bands of all time - Cheap Trick and Kiss - not in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame? (Answer: Rock Hall voters have no testicles)

Big Daddy Donahue scares yet another child.

- Who has the best beard in RNR HoF history? (Answer: deejay Tom "Big Daddy" Donahue) 

- When will this irrelevant pile of rubble move someplace where something significant in rock actually happened (and not just to some town that had a revitalization project going on and outbid everyone else) and transform into a mighty fortress honoring the best of the best as judged by people with actual taste in music and knowledge of things that didn't happen before 1975? (Answer: When Jann Wenner finally hears Guided By Voices or The Replacements and discovers Rock and Roll).

Something like this should be shown to Jann  and the other clueless 500 Rock Hall voters, "Clockwork Orange" style. Maybe they'd grow a set.

You could navigate your way to the Rock Hall website and waste $29.99 on this pile of garbage, only it's somehow out of stock, likely gobbled up by "music aficionados" everywhere. No wonder music sucks so bad.