Tuesday, January 3, 2012

2012: The end of ... Rock Hall lameness?

Once the suits finish moshing to "Give It Away," doing the "Brass Monkey" and getting their rocks off to a Faces reunion led by Rod Stewart and Ronnie Wood, we'll all move on to the Class of 2013, to be announced this fall before the world presumably ends.

And perhaps as a harbinger of the End Times, it's quite possible the Hall could avoid complete flaccidity for once in its existence: Two can't-miss "cool" and legit acts - The Pixies and Public Enemy - are up for induction. These two acts are among our "12 Artists That Must Be Discussed in 2012 For Induction in 2013."Awesome title, eh?


Took makeup and pyro to another level, defined stadium rock, pulled two of the biggest and best gags in rock history by taking the makeup off and putting it back on again and, oh, wrote some amazing songs.


Three of the best musicians ever to play rock music, plus alongside (early) Genesis and YES form the Mount Rushmore of Prog Rock.


Took what came before (Husker Du, David Bowie, Minutemen, etc.) and crystallized it into THE  slick alt-rock sound that dominated the early 1990s and the loud-soft-loud dynamic that Nirvana admittedly borrowed (stole?). Several uber-successful and very lucrative reunion tours should nail down an induction.


I'm going back on my attack on the Beastie Boys and their recent induction - oh, I still don't think they should be in, but just not yet. Someday, maybe. Not yet. But since they are in, voters have now painted themselves in a corner. If the Beasties - sort of a joke act - are in, then Public Enemy, arguably the greatest and most important rap/ hip-hop acts of all time, should be in. Shit, they are one of the greatest and most important acts, period. Hear the drummer get wicked.


Shafted in the 2012 inductions after being led on by the Hall and it's limp voters all year. Put them in already.


Joan Jett was another one who seemed to be led on, but really the band she was a leading force in should get in first anyway - The Runaways. The band went worldwide and foretold the Riot Grrl movement of the 1990s. They weren't just a great chick band, they were a great band period.


We can dream right? They're only one of the best bands of the last 25 years, maybe even 35, with songs that defined a generation and now get passed to kids over and over again like a New Age Led Zeppelin. If Rock Hall voters had actual testicles (and proverbial ones for the females in the group), Paul Westerberg, Tommy Stinson, Bob Stinson, Christopher Mars and Slim Dunlap would be enshrined already.


One of the biggest bands in the world in the late 1970s and early 1980s, plus they have a mountain of amazing singles, plus they are one of the best and most important power-pop bands of all time.


The Smiths were to the 1980s as the Beatles were to the 1960s. If you live in America, you choose to ignore or forget that truth. If you lived in Britain, you know that to be a stone-cold fact. They had so many singles they put out several compilations with almost completely different lineups. Plus they were fronted by The Gay Elvis, Morrissey, i.e. one of the greatest frontmen of all-time.


Sensational songwriters and performers. If you don't love at least one H&O song you don't like music. Even freaking RAPPERS dig Hall & Oates and have sampled tunes like "One On One." Plus, The Mustache. Need I say more?


So innovative, so influential, so f*cking weird. Mark Mothersbaugh continues to prove his genius to this day - not only did he helm wacked out tunes like "Jocko Homo" and "Peek-a-boo," but he also has been writing kids' music and scoring shows and movies for eons.


If there's no T. Rex, there's no Bowie. There's also about 14 fewer Oasis songs, including "Cigarettes and Alcohol." Daltry namechecked the erstwhile Marc Bolan in a song ("To the sounds of old T. Rex, in "You Better You Bet"). 'Nuff said.


If you're going to arbitrarily start chucking in random 1980s acts, why not start with two of the best pop bands of the decade?


  1. "Three of the best musicians ever to play rock music, plus alongside (early) Genesis and YES form the Mount Rushmore of Prog Rock."

    I just like to raise awareness: YES is NOT in the hall!

  2. Check Bob's facial expressions after the botched dual solos: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=VtCTQRGXJps#t=126s

  3. Jamie - only Genesis is in out of those three, and Peter Gabriel will forever be stained by the dark smear of "Invisible Touch," "Illegal Alien" and their ilk.

    Whiskey Bottle Guitar Man - SO SICK never noticed that before.