Kickin' Em Out: 1993

Good songs, talented group, but sorry, no Hall.

New Edition should be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

Why?

Simple: In 1993, the Hall inducted Frankie Lymon & the Teenagers. As a performer. Not even as an "early influence" or through any other kind of b.s. induction category the lame-o voters use to sneak in their favorites.

The Hall says that their smash single "Why Do Fools Fall in Love?" defined the doo-wop sound. (No mention of the lawsuit, not long after their induction, that essentially said other members of the Teenagers, and not Lymon, wrote the tune).


To their credit, they made the R&B Top 10 six times, albeit with songs that I bet you can't hum right now: including "Out in the Cold Again," "I Want You to Be My Girl," "Who Can Explain?" and "The ABC’s of Love." They're all really solid tunes, but are they Hall-worthy?

Perhaps Hall voters were swayed by the tragic story of Lymon's death - he died in 1968, at age 25, of a heroin overdose.


They should not need any swaying to put New Edition in. The group placed within the Top 51 of the Billboard Top 100 eleven times, including four in the Top 10. Don't even mention the R&B charts - they freaking destroyed them for more than a decades with tracks like "Candy Girl," "Mr. Telephone Man," "Can You Stand The Rain" and "Cool It Now." (WARNING: THE BELOW VIDEO IS BEYOND SICK):

Oh, and let's not forget the Spawns of New Edition, which are almost better than the group itself.

Post-Bobby, with-Johnny era.

Bobby Brown solo, Johnny Gill solo (his self-titled 1990 album, featuring "Fairweather Friend," is an R&B/ New Jack classic), Ralph Tresvant solo (ditto his 1990 self-titled solo album, which boasted the big single "Sensitivity") and, of, course, Bell Biv DeVoe, authors of "Poison," "Do Me," etc.

When the Hall finally recognizes modern R&B as a legitimate genre of music, New Edition should be among the first to get in.

Shit. I'm wasting my time on something that should (and hopefully will) get its own post down the road.

For now, let's focus on the task at hand: Sorry Frankie - you and your Teenagers have got to go.

Ruth Brown
Dick Clark
Cream
The Doors
Creedence Clearwater Revival
Frankie Lymon & the Teenagers
Milt Gabler
Etta James
Van Morrison
Sly and the Family Stone
Dinah Washington

"Great" moments in Rock and Roll Hall of Fame History: 1993

Despite its endless flaws, unbelievable ignorance and moronic choices, The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame has at times done the impossible. In 2002, it reunited The Talking Heads. In 1993, it brought about the temporary reformation of eternal prick Eric Clapton and his overrated but still-Hall worthy band Cream.

But that same year, it could not bring about the reunion of Creedence Clearwater Revival, despite the fact that John Fogerty went out of his way to appear at the podium with his former bandmates, Doug Clifford and Stu Cook (cue the most sarcastic golf clap one can muster).

Apparently Fogerty was still pissed about plagiarizing himself, or maybe he was pissed that he had barely made any good music for two-plus decades. Or maybe he could even see the future and the ridiculous vaudeville-circus-like Credence Clearwater Revisited act that Cook and Clifford would take on the road to play for dozens of people at a time.

Whatever the reason, all three surviving members (Tom Fogerty died in 1990) were standing right there on Jan. 12, 1993. All they had to do was walk over to the stage, pick up their instruments, and start playing "dude dude dude lookin' out my back door."

Instead, they fumbled at their acceptance speeches, Clifford going first because no one else would, Cook looking dopey going last and reminding us why Fogerty might have booted him along with Clifford, all while Fogerty bounced around in the background uncomfortably. He took the mic second and backhandedly thanked his fellow bandmates.

In a word, it was awkberg.

"We've disagreed a lot over the years but there was a time when we made really great music together, and I think that's actually the whole reason, the real deal why we're all here at all. So thank you guys ..."

Crickets followed "guys" where there should have been thunderous applause.

Then Fogerty went and played "Green River," "Who'll Stop The Rain" and "Born on the Bayou" with a group of hired hands that included Bruce Springsteen and Robbie Robertson, the latter of which would hilariously copy Fogerty's act of pettiness by not performing with The Band when they went in the next year.

John Freaking Fogerty. What else can you say about a guy who screwed his fans on his 1985 and 1986 tours by refusing to play CCR songs because of his war with his old record label?

Enjoy this crappy rendition of "Green River" at the 1993 induction.