Rock Hall 2015: Green Day to follow in Nirvana's footsteps?

Don't get me wrong. Nirvana should be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Nevermind the fact that they only had three studio albums. Nevermind the fact that Dave Grohl is only a mega-millionaire because of Kurt Cobain and, really, was almost a nobody before Cobain and Krist Novoselic canned Chad Channing and anointed Grohl as the new beatminder. Nevermind that "Nevermind" wasn't really as mind-blowing and revolutionary as rock critics claim it was. They were worthy first-ballot entries.

But how can you justify putting them in before The Pixies, Hüsker Dü and The Replacements, the

You be me for a
while... er, nevermind

three well-known bands that made up the majority of Cobain's musical DNA?

At the very least, the Hall could have inducted The Pixies in the same class.

Grohl and Novoselic handled the whole thing really well, and their selection of a crew of female vocalists to fill in for Kurt was super classy. All is forgiven. Let's move on.

But let's not forget. Because what could happen with the Class of 2015 would actually constitute a historical crime compared to the slight of 2014: Green Day could very well get in before the three aforementioned bands.

The absurdity of this is really driven home by Billie Joe Armstrong's recent fanboy appearances with The Replacements, one of which is captured here:

It's not even worth the keystrokes to compare the importance and brilliance of The Replacements with Green Day and their limp stabs at everything from classic punk to mainstream alt-rock to Clash-esque anthems to pop radio hits.

The Pixies' chances of ever getting in are probably crushed now that the Nirvana induction has come and gone. Same for Hüsker Dü, which probably never really had a shot anyway (despite some vigorous campaigning by the very same Mr. Grohl).

If Green Day gets in, the Hall loses any and all legitimacy. And this blog shuts down.

CDNR readers: Don Henley should be in the Rock Hall

Congratulations to Donald Hugh "Don" Henley, who has been selected by YOU, the readers of Cleveland Does Not Rock, as the next solo artist who should be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

According to the poll, which appeared on this site for several months, 10 people said Henley should get in, 5 people said Sting should be next, and 4 people picked Phil Collins.

Now I don't know about you, but these figures seem to be just a little misleading and it might not represent the most scientific data ever gathered. That might be because only 19 people voted out of the thousands who likely stumbled onto this sacred plot of virtual space by accident.

However, there are a few deductions that can be made from this poll:

Sting: Gracious in defeat. Maybe a little too much so.

- It is believed that Henley is the least lame of the three. I can get behind that: He freaking sang "Hotel California" and "Boys of Summer." How badass is that? He's a drummer who sings. Double badass! He made the album "End of the Innocence," which features a duet with Axl Rose and ample amounts of Bruce Hornsby. Uh ...

- Readers believe that Henley is the better of the two drummer-singers in the poll, blasting Phil Collins out of the water. I'm not down with this. Collins is a better singer; Henley whines like his nuts are dragging on the ground like some old dog walking around a dusty little league baseball field. Collins is (was) ten times cooler, having been the drummer for the best prog band ever, Old Genesis (as opposed to New Genesis, which is pretty assy). Henley is zero percent cool.

- Sting sucks ass.

- This was a horrible poll question.

You might not like this, but DD must go in before Sting.

- People don't give a shit. This might be the most important deduction of all, because while it's sort of a total long shot that Henley and Collins will ever get in as solo artists, the danger is very real that Sting could get in soon. The voters are facing a tough stretch here as '80s bands are coming up. Will these lame f*cks ever vote in any of the amazing left-of-the-dial bands? (Replacements, The Pixies, Hüsker Dü, Minutemen, etc.) What's the verdict on New Wave stuff like Duran Duran? Will they realize that there are more than three rap acts in the history of music? If the answer is no to all of those, Sting enters the picture. Thankfully, the results of this poll show that no one gives a crap if he gets in or not, because any jerk who's into Sting and tripped their way onto this page would have seen the word "Sting" and done whatever they could to make sure their Gordie got critical acclaim.

- Henley rules, and of the two overwrought, cynical, super-smug, post-Eagles people-are-livin'-seedy-lives tracks, the readers of CDNR clearly prefer his "Dirty Laundry" to Glenn Frey's "Smuggler's Blues." You be the judge, and hold on to your horses for a "Dirty Laundry" vs. "Smuggler's Blues" post.